“you’re too much sometimes, bb. i’m just picturing you in a post office”
“but why?”
“cause you’re almost more a movie character to me sometimes lol.”
“i swear you have eaten out more since we’ve been talking that i have my whole life”
“taken more vacays than i ever have lol”
“and generally make me feel like i’ve wasted my life…”
“because i choose to live life to the fullest (or trying to)?”
“i guess lol but it just shows me how much i’ve missed out on. it’s inevitable. well that is true, i’m afraid”

ah, if only people knew the real reasons why i’m splurging so much. regardless of how much i try to pamper myself, feed myself and travel, when i am back in a place i dislike, the pain all starts to come back again.