suicide.

suicide.

i honestly do not know what the people i work with think of me, be it colleagues, art directors, traffic coordinators and clients. i am always drinking, drinking and drinking and didn’t realise how dependent i am of it, offlate. i do not even effing love beer, but yet it soothes me temporarily and calms me down for the night (provided no one provokes me).
i walk in to the office, almost on alternate days with some alcoholic beverage, and am constantly seen holding one. it’s like i’m the mascot of alcohol these days. not something i’m proud of, seriously.
i am not an alcoholic yet. and i don’t wish to get to that level. i honestly just need to cut down on my alcohol consumption, if not completely stop it. i can feel my livers shrinking as we speak. and not to mention the amount of nicotine intake.
why, am i trying to kill myself, at such a young age? the worst thing is, i actually know what i’m doing. i am aware of it but i just dont really want to give a damn about it.


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