happy chinese birthday to me!
hehe. i just found out that today is my chinese birthday. 7th day of the 7th month on the lunar calendar. supposedly very auspicious.
and i had my first reiki
session with sebby yesterday. and he could immediately tell that i had issues with my stomach, private parts (basically the ovaries, i suppose) and other stuffs. very impressive.
ok, time to go treat myself later. too much drama, i just wanna enjoyyyyyy the rest of my days here. im so going to miss the people that i’ve bonded over the past year. oh well, tooooodles….
why does it seem like a punishment for me just because i’ve made my mind based on what’s best for me. does it not matter anymore that i too, should have some sort of importance?
maybe it is true. nobody really cares (about me). all that they can ever think are about themselves.
oh well, i guess i’ve finally seen the true colors of these people. good luck to them. i don’t need it.
have you ever been in the sort of situation where you always try all your might to help out and then get slapped back hard in the face? i have. way too many times. and i have nobody else to blame but me.
i don’t understand. why the eff do i care so much about others. im constantly bending over backwards for people (whether i know them well or not) only to get accused of being too ‘involved’. i always get lashed back at just trying to help. PEOPLE ALWAYS MISINTERPRET my good intentions. the problem with me is, I STILL CARE! omfg. be it with my family, colleagues, friends, whatever. i always CARE TOO FUCKING MUCH.
honestly speaking, i am going to seriously, master the art of being an asshole. if you’re in trouble, i will be the one clapping my hands and say, “THANK GOD I’M NOT YOU!”. i am going to learn how to walk away when people need me most. because i HAVE ALWAYS BEEN TAKEN GRANTED FOR. the world is going to REVOLVE AROUND ME, ME, ME and only ME! so fuck you all who expects me to be the good ear who listens to your problems, or someone to morally support you. FUCK YOU. i’ve got my own problems to deal with, and where the hell were you guys when i needed that good ear?
do i sound frustrated? HELL YEAH I AM. seriously, fuck this world. i’m so tired of being the nice person around. i’m going to walk around with my middle finger up in the air. because baby, that’s what the world needs. MORE ASSHOLES.
hi. i’m back from india. was there for 9 days. glad to be back. gotta make this short since my back’s aching from four hours of chopping garlics. i would seriously want a garlic smasher & chopper for my birthday. yes, that’s right. don’t need anything fancy. just get me those!
so much more work to do. having some close chums over tomorrow to well, eat at my place. it has been a while since i last had people over.
yesterday was stoney’s 5th year with us. sort of like his birthday. i love him to bits, blind or not.
and today’s my, wait, i can’t recall. what’s october (10th month) minus august (8th month). okay. two months difference. my anniversarii with iskii is 1st october. so erm, yea. it’s our 58th monthliversarii, i suppose? heh. love you too biits, bii! my two fav boys in my life. ahh… how blissful.
catch you soon. gotta peel potatoes and eggs now. heeeeeelp!